So, I am on the job hunt and I can tell you this, it is not doing much for my self-esteem. Your worth is set by ticking the boxes. In other words, the REQUIREMENTS are:
An academic degree? - A must! Shit... Don't have one of those. Full-time Job? - Can't do that either as a mama of two little young darlings.
At least 5 years' experience? - Well, I have dabbled in many things in my life, you can say I am well rounded. But who gives a fuck? What defines me? What defines my self-worth? Ticking all the boxes? Too late for that. How many talented versatile people fall between the cracks. Are left feeling worthless and not good enough. So I am not an ACADEMIC. So what? So I fight even harder for someone to give me a chance. I am a talented and driven mommy of two. I won't hide or apologize for the fact I have to clock out sometimes before the sun goes down. I won't apologize for not taking one road that leads in only one direction for the 'ultimate success in life'. But that does not change that fact I need to survive. To earn money. So do I settle? Do I give in to reality? Well the answer to that sadly, is yes, I do sometimes. It's like the question... How many colors are there in a rainbow? some will say seven, others will say far more. Can you for sure determine if one or the other is surely mistaken? Don't we all wish upon a life surrounded by nothing, but filled with everything. A life of self meaning, not of trying to tick all the boxes. Some of us to 'escape to the countryside' and away from trying to define everything. A simple life. But most of us are just trying to keep up with the hectic pace, the demands. There are so many, and I am tired. But then the alarm goes off at 6 am and once again I line-up for what is expected, in my life. Endless battles filled with colorful flowers, bursting from dark cracks. All will fall into place.
But what if it doesnt'? Well, that's just life.
If you told me then, what I know now, as a little sprout embedded in the English countryside, in my Daddy's hands.
But would I have changed anything?
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